Both hands on the wheel. 10 and 2. Especially in the rain.

Monday, February 11, 2008

Amateurity...not to be confused with Immaturity.

Clearly I've been stricken with both, and it showed this weekend at the 2008 Pacesetter Steel Service Cycling Team camp. Training camp? Maybe. Drinking camp? Yes, please and thank you. This report will have to be delivered in chapters...primarily because the details are slowly coming back to me. Very slowly. I've got a sprained liver and some battered legs. To protect the innocent, some (read: all) of the fine print will never grace these pages. And quite honestly, when I think back on the weekend and the performance of the team, I'm proud, disgusted, afraid, nervous, and a little giddy all at the same time. Most of my disgust is for The Mainstay, who missed the whole thing for a weekend of Mexican motorpacing. For that, you're fired...at least until you win a sprint at the Tucker 500.

I'm proud of the fact that this group of amateurs was able to lay it down for 6 hrs and 120 miles in tornado-like conditions...after a night of hard drinking. I'm also proud of the fact that this same group of amateurs followed up said ride with another 10 hours of heavy drinking. And followed that up with another wind-whipped ride on Sunday morning. Find me a Pro that can pull that off. You won't. Because when it comes to drinking AND riding, a Pro is an Amateur. And to borrow one from The Imposter; the man who so often steals from me- Pros of the world, I present you with this:


















You know training camp is a success when you have riders hitching rides back to the hotel at 3 a.m. with the Papa John's pizza guy. Corky- how do you get lost (on foot) in a town that you lived in for 7 years? Seriously. It's less than a square quarter-mile in its entirity. You've seen every inch of it. I'm very proud of you.

And I guess we picked up a new teammate along the way. Apparently Captain Skymall is now scouting talent for Pacesetter Steel Service. Maybe Locos isn't hiring. Skymall even graced us with his presence for Sunday's ride. Just like old times. Now back to our new teammate. Imposter, what is going on here? First it's the roomate, now it's Big Jon. We need to get you a W, son! With every passing week, this pattern is becoming increasingly clear. It's becoming more and more apparent that the ladies aren't flocking to the hardest worker. The good news is as follows: The Imposter will be bringing home the bacon (and the ladies) this weekend in the year's first Tundra TT. Know this. It's for real this time, and I'm posting another poll just to make sure everyone's in agreement here.

7 comments:

kim potter said...

seems like Imposter's roommate's ladyfriend likes the winners.

The Amateur said...

Well you're gonna like The Imposter this weekend. GUARONTEEEED!

Matt said...

I think you should all talk to crowe and make sure you get the correct spelling for the impostor.
you never know who's going to show up.

kim potter said...

well it looks like (due to popular public opinion) that Imposter will win this weekend's Tundra TT!! I have to side with the majority on this one (n=3 as of yet).

point made.

statement noted.

thank you for your attention.

Stijn D. said...

What a crock that fake pro wanna be is looking for a set of aero wheels to use for the weekend if he had a set of nads he would roll it on the road bike with no aero gear and win... That's the pro way but I guess that's why the inpostors blog is still 2bepro not ImaPro. Probably why the amateur was hanging with him in the attack zone with only 2 gears... unlike the impostor with 20... what did the sign say? HARDEN THE FUCK UP, AMEN.

The Amateur said...

wow...what's with all the venom? imposter, did you see boonen and his 20 gears up there? me neither. just sayin'.

Matt said...

It seems our boy tom is a bit more worried about today's "massage" than keeping with the group.

http://users.telenet.be/Alanaatje/
Tom%20Boonen%20klein.jpg